my 25th burfday

before i continue on the next leg of my fyp marathon for the next meeting this coming thursday...

on 15th Jan, 7:18am

*hp buzz*

Joko: Hey dear dear, message me when u are up and awake k? Happy Birthday!

Me: *stops snoozing after my 7am alarm on my hp, reads message.. ponder.. mmm.. is my gf sending me food again?.. replies sms and starts sitting up at my bed stoning.. *

later again at 8:21am..

Joko: Oh u can go wash up and stuff.. but i am sending u somethin so u stay around in your room k?

Me: mmm *ponder .. i think she must be sending me mac breakfast..haha silly girl... again spend money on me.. . mmm..confirm .. reply back*

Joko: ha ha how u guess de. Then no a surprise le.. pfft..

8:30am

Joko: Hey dear dear.. where are u? go to the bus stop in front of your hall k?

Me: mmm *still stoning in my room... after waking up an hr ago. i decide to finally wash up.. , opens door.. look straight across the field and i was shocked to see my Gf walking over from the bus stop outside my room...OMG*

thanks Dear .. for the pleasant surprise the other morning, haa. it was the best bdae surprises i have so far!

thanks for taking the day off to spend it with me in school though i was busy and wasn't able to spend much time with you while you were here. Sorry for making you spend so much money on the cab on your way to school..

Thanks for the nice bag, and the cute diy scrapbook card too! haha..

my mood was kinda crappy for that week and thanks to you..

Your presence that day alone brighten my day and many other days to come too. =)

Thank You and I love you! haha.. <3<3<3

to my friends who celebrated my bdae with me one way or another last last friday

thanks guys for being there for me though i'm always busy with one activity or another...

it was really heartwarming to have you guys remember and even get me something...

thanks for supporting me and always cheering me on as i fight my fyp.

to my lawn bowling friends who decided to throw me a surprise celebration on last saturday

thanks guys for taking care of me when i am having trouble doing so... thanks for helping me recharge my batteries and the encouragement! (thanks for the funny perspiration shirt and the uniqlo shirt.. mebbe i can use it for the career fair this week)

lost

second day of school and on to my third lesson in this new semester and i feel lost in the chaos of fitting back into school... the need to get new notes, new books. nothing seem quite right at all today and i'm rather vexed over several thoughts.

i'm still trying to detach myself from my small little world which just revolves around my fyp and re-adjust back to juggling it together with other subjects and modules and trainings.

once again, everything is just fighting for a piece of my time, and the thought alone makes me feel pretty stretched already.

thinking of my fyp as i continue to rush my solidworks, kinda puts off my mood for anything else right now... that includes my very own birthday, which i don't think i will be having much of any celebrations for it at all...

speaking about bdaes..

if not for faizal's reminder last night i would have forgotten to wish ashley and gary happy bdae today... besides these two birthdays, there was also joyce's 21st birthday party last week. yu juan's 21st birthday party is also coming soon too and then there's Huikai's one next week together with my mom's.

For Ashley and Joyce, i feel bad for not being able to celebrate their bdaes like i like to, but i dun think i can fully relax and do any celebrating properly while wrestling with the thought of needing to be at my desk and rush my model out soon so i can send in for the final fabrication and this must be done soon. dilemma.

Right now each day, i'm just praying that i don't receive any email from my fyp partner and my professor for a meeting to finalise the model. Though I've been working hard everyday for the past 2 weeks, i've yet to complete my part of the model ... and it doesn't seem to be so until a few more days.

arugh,

i hate this feeling but would i fall to my death if i let go?

dust

i returned back to last night and was greeted by a dusty bed, full of cat fur and a dusty table.

my shelves were still occupied by last semester's notes...

rather than to pack them under my bed or into my wardrobe cupboard, i think i should start to pack them to bring back home.

its my last semester.

after three and a half years of staying in this room.

now back to my fyp ...

we are powerful beyond measure

Our Greatest Fear

- Marianne Williamson

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light not our darkness that most frighten us.

We ask ourselves, who am i to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.

There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that

other people won't feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine,

we unconsciously give other people

permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear,

Our presence automatically liberates others.

***

It's the second time i heard this short prose..

from the movie akeelah and the bee.. first was from coach carter..

as i thought through my grades and cap yesterday, i calculated that i had to score As in every thing now on in order to get my 2nd lower which is kinda hard.

but who's stopping me but myself alone ?

last sem, final push, whatever it is, you will still get a job, get married, start a family and in the process grow old

even if you don't get into exxon , even if you don't get the class you want,

you will still make do, with the best of your ability.

***

Although Batam was not really a dream destination, i guess i enjoyed myself still and managed to relaxed a little bit before school starts...

The hotel stay at Holiday Inn was nice and i think i enjoyed it more than heading out to Nagoya town and Batam Center for shopping since i brought the wii along and we could swim and do gym and play ping pong. There isn't much to buy over there anyway. Food-wise, you've got your regular seafood restaurants, which like everywhere try to rip you off. We had more vege dishes than any meat or fish. Had my A&W treat in a like 20 years and i now remember why they closed down. Had my first body massage, not sure if it's supposed to be nice or just pain but it didn't leave any deep impression on me... and i managed to burn all my ruppiah on 3 Polo shirts.. with some help from joko.. haha..

we were excited till we paid for the food and saw the portions

celebrating new years one hour later, watching a bunch of Indo officials on tv, none as excited as those mediacorp actors/ actresses we usually see ...

can't wait to watch Invictus

I am the master of my fate.

I am the captain of my soul.

school starts next week. this week is fyp cram week.

Happy New Year to everyone once again!

x'mas fun

well... x'mas week was pretty much fun this year... i had parties on fri, sat, sun.. 3 days of continuous partying...

Fri was x'mas day and the first ever dragonboat x'mas party for the 06 batch ... almost everybody turned up though we were missing a few 'arhats' and girlfriends.. well.. i hope that over time... the girlfriends will also know each other better and then we can have more of this kind of stuff in future for other occasions besides x'mas as well.

attendance for the nite ...

Thanks for making the point of coming even if you were late..

arhat pose

the galfrens.. the ladies who's been waiting for us, supporting us

thanks to boon and leslie for majority of the planning and everyone else who helped a lil here and there thereafters...

my parents were happy to host the thing... saying that we are a fun bunch of people.. noisy and happy.. and helpful to stay back and help up. they also say 'that tall tall one with the earrings ' was rather responsible to stay back and clean up.. (snicker ... hahaha). My parents were also impressed with charmaine's potato salad... keep bugging me to ask both leslie and charmaine how to do it.. my dad and mom.. the copy ninjas promptly converted the bunch of potatoes we have at home into a copy of her potato salad without the bacon bits... after a fair bit of discussion over coffee on the morning of boxing day.

sat was my aunt's party for the family.. been a while since my maternal family met up... and also a while since i saw my nephews and niece.. haha.. it was kinda funny when my cousin came and promptly made fun of my younger female cousins and my sister by introducing his son that they were their aunties.. drawing some sibei sian faces..

my dad's idea of a log 'cake' .... log pork. he's grinning from ear to ear... for having trick two kids into thinking it is some chocolate roll/ cake this x'mas.

'san duo hua' .. my mom, big aunt, and small aunt..

haha.. brought the wii for the kids.. (my nephews and nieces). kinda surprised that my female cousins dunno what wii was initially..

my cousin's son.. cute boy.. he offered me his milo just so i have 'enough energy and win' for him in the raving rabbids game and he will take the initiative to ask for help when he isn't coping well.. . think my cousin brought him up well.

Sunday was for my paternal family ... celebrating the annual x'mas at my grandma's place... nothing special really happened though it was nice seeing my cousin yolanda back from perth.. The highlight of the day instead was on the morning's brunch at Spruce. Finally ... one of the few sundays without a training... without hesitation, me and joko decided to head to this place at tanglin after being denied an earlier visit cos of my ns mobilisation a few weeks ago.. (hence the rant)

Spruce!

the interiors..

it is a rather small establishment.. like some old barracks retrofitted into a restaurant... it's rather cosy nonetheless.. and it isn't too cold inside ... just nice..

the exteriors from inside..

its a sheltered balcony with fans, its almost like inside minus the air con.

Big brekkie, eggs benny and the damn nice banana pancakes!!

it's my first time having poached eggs as well for the fun of it..

anyway.. i have rush to the harbour-front now.. heading off to batam for a getaway with the lawn bowlers for the annual yr end gathering..

a rather haphazard update but a

happy new year and a belated x'mas to all of you.. !

Jingle times...

YAY! the time waster interim is done. finally.. i can move on to something more pressing.. but fun...

now on, i have to quickly develop the shank, ankle component for yun li before we can send for fabrication.

x'mas!

PIMP db in 2 days time. .. i'm finally in the mood to look forward to it.

i need to set up my x'mas tree.. and i hope i dun dread the process of it as i stretch my arms and legs...

Mr Peh been doing a mighty fine job .. and i'm now reeling from the v crunches... my (f)abs hurt alot.

My blister got worse after land training on monday too.. its stupid of me to try to run. now i have a blister in a blister...

thanks to joko.. its nice and clean now..

daddy tan was too lazy to set it up, so i have to tell him to lug it out and i set it up myself.

things to do today (besides fyp)

collect chairs from my small aunt and mebbe collect more from charmaine too..

set up xmas tree

clean up house,

get sis to clean up her room and stun her table

go back hall and pick up my whiteboard?

take picture for my resume?

buy pressies

* * *

I see you

the army should look into a lightweight high range, low noise Naruto type radio communicators just like Jakescully's over here..

flying in the sky can talk to alien gf and brother in the jungle,

friend in helicopter,

Stealing away some moments from my interim report that doesn't seem to be finishing despite my daily efforts..

I just caught Avatar last nite with Joko... it was great! I wonder how much this movie was scaled back seeing that James Cameron did reduced Titantic from a initial i think 4 hr film to a final 3 hr film.. The storyline is rather refreshing though not entirely new and unexpected as how a person's moral compass fueled by love and attachment will always lead them to triumph over those blinded with power and greed. Once again the movies has brought more insights to how high tech future computers can be ... think of those itouch kind of projector screens.. like minority report, iron man .. Also once again Mech warrior inspired units were presented as the future mechanized tanks for the jungle...

also, its kinda funny for me to see the mother of all alien movies, sigourney weaver in another alien movie.. i think her casting has to do with her Aliens background

* * *

mmm..

some interesting thoughts about my cip for ren ci today too..

When leaders of such organisations fall and mishandle funds, the organisation are affected the greatest, the dependents will also suffer as people turn away from it.

as i approach a couple of people today for donations, most of them were kind enough to drop a dime or more but i've got this lady today who once hearing that this donation was for ren ci, she just went 'oh .. then no..' and stomped away and one couple decided to discuss with me about the organisation's previous head's misdeeds. Best of all, i've got one uncle who just went 'ARRUGH!' when he saw Ren Ci imprinted on the tin can..

mmm..

if you wanna do good, you better be good.

else all the good people you take care

will suffer.